Sunday, March 5, 2017

BREAKING : Harvard University Announces '6-month Tea Selling Experience' Compulsory for All Admissions

A tea stall vendor poses while wearing a mask of BJP
prime ministerial candidate Narendra Modi in Kolkata. 

After proposing to award Hon Doctorate to India's Prime Minister Narendra Modi, Harvard, world's top university, has made a revolutionary change in its admission policy. 

"Prime Minister Narendra Modi has clearly proved that "a son of a poor mother", like him, can manage India's complex economy in a much better way than highly experienced Harvard-educated professional economists some of whom are even Nobel Laureates," Drew Faust, President of Harvard University, is supposed to have said in a yet to be released press note. Ms. Faust was clearly referring to the recent election speech of Modi in which he claimed that his decision of demonetizing India's high-value currency notes - called NoteBandi - was a great decision. Modi also gave GDP growth figures and other data in support of his claim.

Thursday, March 2, 2017

PM Narendra Modi likely to be awarded Honorary Doctorate degrees by Harvard & Oxford Universities

Nobody is happier than PM Narendra Modi from the announcement of the Central Statistics Office (CSO), Ministry Of Statistics & Programme Implementation, Government Of India, informing the world that India's GDP in Q3 of the FY 16-17, grew by 7%. 

PM Narendra Modi, in a hard-hitting election speech in UP, strongly devalued those who were predicting that India's GDP would be badly hit due to his decision of demonetization 500 and 1000-rupee notes - comprising 86.4% of the total value of currency  in circulation - under his biggest drive against black money, terrorism and fake currency menace. 

Saturday, December 24, 2016

All India Pickpockets Association Urges PM not to go Totally Cash-less

F4Fnews has learned that the All India Pickpockets Association (AIPA), representing around 125,000 pickpockets from around the country, has written a letter to Prime Minister Modi urging him not to convert India into a totally cash-less society. "We are the oldest self employed community of professionals whose existence has been suddenly threatened by your NoteBandi," said the association president in the letter. The name of the president and address of the association could not be traced till the time of writing this post.

Monday, November 7, 2016

BREAKING : Donald Trump Decides to Release His 12,000-page Tax Returns

Ivanka Trump
Donald John Trump, the Republican Party nominee for President of the United States in the 2016 election, has finally decided to release his 2015 tax return to make it available for public scrutiny.

As we know, Mr. Trump was under tremendous pressure to declare his tax returns to clear off all doubts about his actual earnings, his wealth management skills and whether he had obtained or diverted funds illegally, particularly from Russia.

F4Fnews has learned that Trump's own supporters in his campaign team were advising him to declare the information but Trump was not willing to do that giving flimsy reasons such as his returns were under the federal audit and there were chances that any small insignificant detail contained in the disclosed data could be misread and spoil his chances of election as it happened with Mitt Romney in 2011.

Friday, April 1, 2016

'Vijay Sabhas' to be held all over India to celebrate Dawood Ibrahim's 'Ghar Vapsi' today

Dawood Ibrahim
F4Fnews sources from Islamabad have revealed that Pakistan leadership is alarmed by the forceful speech in Brussels by Prime Minister Narendra Modi in which he asked the United Nations to accept India’s demand to pass a resolution defining terrorism failing which the UN could become irrelevant. Narendra Modi has been demanding criteria to be fixed not only to define terrorism but also its supporters and for declaring a country a supporter of terrorism (terrorist country).

Thursday, March 24, 2016

How Venkaiah Discovered God's Gift?

Union minister for Urban development Venkaiah Naidu, on March 21, 2016, made a strikingly profound statement declaring Prime Minister Narendra Modi as "God's gift to India" and also a "messiah of the poor". He said so at the BJP's national executive meeting in New Delhi. The statement is seen as part of the Resolution at BJP's National Executive meeting.

Ever since Venkaiah termed Narendra Modi as "God's gift to India", we at F4Fnews, have been flooded with inquiries regarding Venkaiah's new discovery about Narendra Modi. A large number of people, cutting across the party line, have been asking how did Venkaiah come to know about this fact and why he took almost two years to tell this to the people of India after Modi became Prime Minister. Some people think by hiding this vital fact from the public Venkaiah and his party have cheated them. "After all, any gift given by anyone to India, automatically makes people of the country the custodians of that gift," they feel. The outrage of the people is distinctly visible on the Social Media like Twitter and Facebook where they have shared their mixed feelings.

Thursday, September 3, 2015

PM Modi planning a ride to Mars on Mangalayan 2, scheduled for 2016 launch

Prime Minister Narendra Modi, happy with the huge success of the Mars Orbiter Mission (India's first venture into the interplanetary space) is contemplating to visit Mars riding on Mangalyaan 2 that is all set to be launched in 2016 by ISRO. Modi's enthusiasm also stems from the appreciation he received, and the credit his government got, for the Mars Orbiter Mission despite the fact that his government had absolutely no role in this mission.

The Indian Space Research Organisation (ISRO) is the space agency of the Indian government founded by Dr. Vikram Sarabhai on August 15, 1969.
NaMo to launch "Shift City" on Mars under "Make Mars India" Project. The project to be completed in 2017
According to our Mars-based sources, Narendra Modi wants Indians to capture key strategic locations on Mars and cover up as much area as possible before his counterparts in developed countries can even think of launching their manned spacecraft to land on Mars.

Scientists have found Mars to be the most hospitable of the planets (other than Earth) in terms of its surface conditions and the likely presence of water.
Indian scientists have already proved that even the cost of travel to Mars - @ Rs. 7 per km - is quite affordable. "With the dwindling prices of oil and advancements in energy efficient space technologies, it is expected that, by 2020, a trip to Mars could be undertaken in less than 24 hrs. at the cost of New Delhi to New York trip," said sources close to experts who are believed to be advising Modi on this project. The project has been nicknamed "Make Mars India" Project by Modi who has initiated several India-centric mega projects that have 'India' in their names.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Coming Soon..... All India Directory of Senas 2016

Publication will NOT be available for sale. Only for reference. Expected to be ready within one year.

Don't contact for listing - free or paid. 

GD Jasuja : Founder, Faking4Fun Twitter : @gdjasuja
(Don't) Follow us on Twitter @F4FNews at your own risk
News items on this website are manufacured in the writer's own in-house plant for his own captive consumption. No Rights Reserved, or Unreserved.

(OCOA - On Condition Of Anonymity)  

Monday, July 27, 2015

Jumla Turning Real Jumla : Banks under SBI's guidance likely to credit Rs. 15 lack to every citizen's a/c

On the recommendation of the Uttar Pradesh unit of BJP, some senior central ministers have worked out a unique Banking Jumla under the leadership of Party supremo. A F4Fnews source, who claims to be close to the PMO, said : "Our Banking Jumla is inspired by a recent goof up by SBI with the a/c of Urmilaji of Kanpur." 

Thursday, July 16, 2015

आम आदमी पार्टी नें एक हजार करोड़ रुपये का आफर ठुकराया

Say No to Black Money

आम आदमी पार्टी नें कुछ दिनों से पार्टी फंड के लिये बहुत बड़े पैमाने पर मुहिम शुरू करी है. खुद केजरीवाल ने पार्टी के समर्थकों से दिल खोल कर पार्टी को दान करने के लिये गुजारिश करी है. शोशियल मीडिया पर भी आम आदमी पार्टी के समर्थकों ने नये नये नुस्खों से पार्टी के लिए डोनेशन जमा करने के किये लोगों को आकर्षित कर रहे हैं. पिछले कुछ ही दिनों में पार्टी करीब सात लाख रूपये पाने में सफल रही है. केजरीवाल ने अपनी अपील में कहा था कि हम गलत तरीकों से धन प्राप्त नहीं करना चाहते. इसलिये आम जनता से दस रूपये जैसी छोटी राशी भी लेने के लिये तैयार हैं. मिडिया में जो खबरें आ रही हैं उनसे पता चलता है कि आम आदमी पार्टी की माली हालत दिवालियेपन की कगार पर है और यदि पार्टी एक अच्छी खासी रकम जुटाने में सफल नहीं होती है तो उससे पार्टी के काम को गहरा धक्का लगेगा.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Indians to get Free Ray Ban Eyewear to see 'Acche Din'

Prime Minister Narendra Modi, along with his top ministers, has worked out a grand Programme to celebrate his government's one year in office. The celebrations started with Modi's mega rally in Mathura on May 25.

Narendra Modi has already declared that 'Acche Din' have arrived but his opponents are not able to see the good work done by his government during the past one year.

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Hillary won't run for President in 2016 : Bill Clinton

Bill Clinton, in an early morning press meet today, informed that his family had a marathon meeting last night to discuss whether or not Hillary should run for President in 2016 elections. 

"After considering all the pros and cons, we found that since her chances of winning are very thin, we decided that she should keep herself out of the race," Bill Clinton said. 

According to him, Hillary was upset initially but soon realized the ground realities and agreed not to pursue her ambition further.

Indian Institute of Tea Technology & Management (IITTM)

Indian Institute of Tea Technology & Management (IITTM) offers  6-Year Integrated Course (PGDTTM) : First of Its Kind in the World

Admissions to open soon for the Post Graduate Diploma in Tea Technology and Management (Equivalent to Ph.D.).

IITTM is going to be the first global institute set up under the Private-Private-Private-Partnership (PPPP) model to train those having high political ambitions. 
"The idea is to explore the entire 'Tea Environment' as a political tool to transform the present day budding politicians into smart and successful leaders of tomorrow"
Shocked by the meteoric rise of Narendra Damodardas Modi in politics, from a small time tea seller to India's Prime Minister, political scientists, the world over, decided to explore the possible role of the art of successfully making and marketing Indian tea in political science in India and elsewhere. As a first step, a number of influential NRIs with close links with top leadership of Congress party have come together and launched an exclusively dedicated institute named IITTM.